Gibby Zerefski: "What is the one thing that could ruin my senior prom?"
Kristin Davis: "That you would trip on your Barbie heels and I'd be named prom queen. ...Did I just say that out loud?"

~ Never Been Kissed (1999)

                                                                                                                 Living a Dream
                                                                                                               By Ashley Boettcher

As teens, we are used to getting weird looks, getting ignored, being bored, getting into trouble and backing out when it’s far too late. But imagine if your life was meaningless? What if you felt as frail as a cold winter’s night? Imagine that you didn’t care whether you lived or died because your circumstances have left you numb. What if you lost everything you loved and once had? What if you felt hurt, unloved, used, abused and thrown away? How would you go on? How would you gain the courage to even go on? How would you change things… what if you couldn’t, even if it meant living a dream?

This idea may be a little foreign to some, but to others, this scenario is too real, too true. When I was 16, I knew a girl who hated herself. One day, I looked over at her, during a youth group meeting. It was time for prayer, so everything was quiet, and in that silence, I was exposed to the raw truth. On her arm was a scar where she carved:

“I hate myself”.

I realized that my generation was lost. We’d rather die than venture into the unknown. We’d rather get wasted that feel pain, and we always find the worst possible ways to get attention… even if it means death, homelessness, or pregnancy.

Why has this happened? Every generation struggles with its troubled teen; but the answer is that teens have forgotten what a dream is. Some dictionaries describe dreams as a vision, aspiration, wish or goal. Other words describing a dream are desire, ambition, goal or ideal.

Cinderella is a perfect example of what a dream is. Despite her under privileged life, serving her step sisters as a slave, waiting on them hand and foot, she kept a secret place for a dream. Through her dream, Cindy reaches out to teens on all levels. It is not just her despair we identify with, it is her hope that any girl can be swept off her feet, any guy can win the girl, and by believing in our dreams, we can accomplish anything!

Teenagers aren’t always thought as powerful, life changing people, so our aspirations tend to get swept under the rug. We are raised to believe dreams are for children, that they don’t belong in a cut throat, “me first” look out for #1 society. We are taught that believing in dreams will get us crushed in the business world… and the truth is, NOT believing in them is what is killing us. Civilization pushes the idea that we are only worth what we appear to be. For some of us, that is nothing.

After I saw that girl at the youth meeting, something was calling me to make a difference in the lives of teens my age. I thought, “Why can’t I make an impact in a world of different cultures and different ideas?” I, as a teen am able to make more impact now, than I will be able to as an adult. So I published a book. I gathered input from teens and compiled a story about one girl named Morgan Parker, who has lost her way as she navigated the teenage years. Morgan looses hope, but at the same time is determined to change the way society labels her and others like her. Society labels individuals as black, white, blonde, dark, geek, popular, successful… wallflower. These labels crush the dreams inside of teens that could someday become reality. Even other teens crush the dreams we hold inside by bullying, growing up too fast, or by trying to gain approval.

At the end of the story, Morgan is forced to decide whether to chase after her dreams, or to fall back into the shadows of her hurtful past, and like us all, her dreams are what drive her.

My dream is what drove me. As I researched publishing, I learned that after hiring a publisher, agent, proofreader, editor, and distributor, I wouldn’t even be able to pay the printing bill. So I decided to self publish. Self publishing is not for the weak willed procrastinator. After $10,000 of fund raising, and 2 years of hard work, I had my book on the market. But still, national bookstores won’t accept self published books, especially by teens. (There go the labels again…) The work is ongoing, but as I believe in my dream, I am helping others believe in theirs too. So what’s wrong with being an adult who believes in dreams? Nothing! What’s wrong with believing in fairytales, true love and happily ever after? Nothing, as far as I can see. I’m living a dream, and it got me this far- where could it get you?


ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Ashley L. Boettcher is an 18 year old author from western Massachusetts. She has successfully self published her novel, The Book of Dreams, The Life Story of a Teenage Girl and started her teen publishing company, ALB Books. Ashley is working on her Bachelors while advertising the premier of her book. You can get more info by contacting her at ljabphil413@juno.com  or visiting her website, (still under construction, but viewable) www.ALBbooks.com
Ashley hopes to continue writing and publishing, and is currently coaching other teens on how to self publish. She intends on publishing other teen’s books soon.



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